WHEN SHE TELLS YOU, SHE FOUND A LUMP...HERE'S WHAT YOU DON'T SAY.
IT'S GOING TO BE OK.
- "Let's remain optimistic" is a better way to show faith without making a false promise. We don't know if it's going to be OK. An unknown lump is a question mark, not a definitive statement.
YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE BIG BREASTS.
- I'm a woman. I have breasts. Small breasts are still breasts. Besides, while your intention may be to comfort me by thinking that the size of my breasts exempt me from lumps, they don't. I have mammary glands. I have breasts and there's a lump in them.
- This doesn't even make a lick of sense. Besides being easier said than done, I will naturally stress about the potential outcomes. My blood pressure just went up. The truth is, this could be the first recorded day in which the fight for my life begins, I AM STRESSED. I am thinking about all the things I haven't taught my daughter yet or the Crossfit classes I didn't go to (that Groupon is burning a hole in my email). I'm thinking about all the times I didn't go running when I should have. The flower bed outside my office is holding my gaze a little longer. I'm thinking that faith isn't facts. I AM STRESSED because suddenly my boob is a breast, and that lump is a 3MM test site. My fears are sitting on somebody's desk as a TO DO list item under 'CHECK IF SHE HAS CANCER." Suddenly, I'm a prayer that I hope gets answered but if it isn't me, it will be another woman, who just got a promotion at work or recently found out she's pregnant and the guilt washes over me. Because statistics say, it has to be some of us and if it isn't me, it will be her and I am not comforted by that at all how I should be.
YOU'RE NOT YOUR _____.
- This might hurt the worst because genetically I am my dad. I have his smile, his hands and feet, his love for bread and his pre-cancerous cells. I have his history. But most of all, I have his memory. I know full well how things that don't seem like a big deal can and will change your life forever. I know that a stomachache can kill you so I know what a lump can do and I'm praying, I'm begging, it doesn't do those things to me. And at this point, I can't think of anything to say but prayers.
WHEN SHE TELLS YOU SHE FOUND A LUMP, TRY THIS INSTEAD
Because there are a thousand ways to say 'I love you' & that's the kind of healing we all need.
WHAT DO YO YOU NEED ME TO DO?
HAVE YOU EATEN?